Friday, May 6, 2016

One Day At a Time

Pervasive Parenting 
By Kodey Toney 

One Day At A Time

I was looking through my "On This Day" feed on Facebook and noticed a post from 2010 that made me think a little. I had posted what can be deemed now a desperation call for sympathy by most, but what I felt at the time was meant to educate the masses. The post said simply, "Meltdowns suck!!!"
This is still a true statement, but when I posted it six years ago I wanted everyone to know it, and then understand they are not the only ones going through tough situations. 
Konner had obviously just gone through a really bad meltdown, but by that I mean his eyes had glazed over, he was staring through people, screaming uncontrollably, probably hitting himself and possibly others. 
He was tired and having a long day, which means we probably had several events to attend, and he was way overstimulated. 
I had tried my famous "Konner Sandwich", a move where I lay him down, put a blanket or pillow on top of him, and then apply pressure by laying on top of him with as much weight as he can handle. It usually works pretty well, but this time it did nothing. I remember trying the burrito method as well, where you wrap him up in a blanket real tight. 
I bring all of this up because I found it interesting. The fact is, we've had some meltdowns recently, but I would say they are extremely mild. I can't remember the last time we had what I would classify as a major meltdown in well over a year. 
As I've said before this is one of the most helpless feelings you will ever know when your child is in so much physical and mental pain, and there is nothing you can do about it. 
So why has Konner been relatively meltdown free? I can't say for sure, but I feel it's because we have exposed him to things that cause his overstimulation. This may seem cruel, but what you have to do, in a sense, is build up a tolerance. You have to teach them how to build up an immunity, if you will, to those loud rooms, bright lights, strange smells, and scratchy touches. I'm not saying to torture your children. Start slow and keep pushing them until you see the frustration, back off for a while, and then do it again. It's not easy to do. You will experience crazy meltdowns along the way. But, when you can take your child out in public with only small outbursts or none then it will be worth it.

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